Shrubs, A Healthy, Energizing, Fruit Vinegar Drink

The benefits of drinking unpasteurized, raw vinegar has long been documented and utilized for improved health and beauty. Combining raw honey and raw vinegar are described as the "elixir of youth" and is even believed to fight cancer by helping to maintain an alkaline body pH.

But if you have trouble acquiring a taste for the honey and vinegar blend in a daily glass of water, then perhaps making shrubs is the next best alternative. Now this recipe uses sugar rather than honey but the use of honey could easily be substituted to see how it turns out. I do make my elderberry syrup with honey so I don't see why it couldn't be used in place of the white sugar.

The word "shrub" comes from the Arabic sharbah which means "a drink". Drinking vinegar isn't as common today as in the past, but using vinegar has a history going back to the Babylonians and Romans. Without preservatives, wine turned to vinegar and never went to waste. it was also added to water to make it safer to drink. The acetic acid in vinegar acts as a preserving agent so recipes were recorded on how to enjoy seasonal fruits year round. High in antioxidants, shrubs were an excellent way to get enough vitamin C during the winter months and to help ward off illness. Colonial period sailors made sure to carry shrubs on their boats to help prevent scurvy.

The most common way to make shrubs is to create a fruit-flavored vinegar and sweeten it with sugar. The resulting syrup is then added to water when needed for a very refreshing, energy boosting drink. People laboring long hours in the fields during the heat of the summer were extremely grateful for the energy boost of such refreshment.

Be sure to use raw, unpasteurized vinegar that still contains the "mother". The Mother of Vinegar occurs naturally as strand-like enzymes of connected protein molecules. Though commercial vinegar contains the 5% acidity, the powerful enzymes and minerals are destroyed during the distilling process. Public demand for clear, pretty vinegar is the reason raw vinegar is rarely seen on store shelves. For the health benefits of minerals, pectin for fiber, and amino acids, be sure to use raw vinegar.

If you have access to seasonal fresh fruit, use whatever you have. If you don't or during the off season for fresh fruit, you can find frozen berries in the grocery store. I used Costco's Kirkland brand since they sell in money saving larger size bags. The berry blend here uses rasperries, blueberries and blackberries but you can use strawberries, cherries, cherries, peaches, elderberries, etc.

TO MAKE SHRUB

Place 2 cups of berries in a pot.

Pour 1 cup raw Apple Cider Vinegar over the berries.

Heat the berries on low heat and add 1 1/2 cup sugar.

Stir to blend and dissolve the sugar.

Bring to a boil and remove from the heat.

Mash the mixture to crush the berries and put through a strainer to remove any pulp.

Pour the concentrate into a jar and store in the refrigerator. Try to use within six months.

To use:
Add ice cubes to a glass along with 2 - 4 tbsp of syrup (depends on how you like it).
Top with cold water and drink up!

Baths, a Time for nursing the Body and Soul

Ever wonder why a hot bath is such a comfort?
According to this article from Daily Mail Reporter when people feel loneliness they tend to feel cold and the feel of a hot bath can help with feelings of isolation. There is a link between physical warmth and social warmth and it all begins in childhood where so much comfort comes from hot things like soup, hot drinks and the love from those who offer them. Warm water can substitute for desired company and help lift that down in the dumps feeling that is so often helped by being around other people.

You certainly don't have to feel lonely to desire the escape from it all in a nice soak. Perhaps you have had plenty of socialization for a day and just want time to be left alone and nurse your frazzled nerves. Take time for yourself once in a while and close that bathroom door for at least 30 minutes.

Humans have a natural pull towards the sea and the theory is that since the water content of our bodies is so similar to seawater we feel a connection. There is a quote by JFK that says, "We are tied to the ocean. And when we go back to the sea, whether it is to sail or to watch, we are going back from whence we came."

Warm water is so very therapeutic for not only the soul, but for the body as well. Stiff muscles and achy joints benefit so greatly from the heat and relaxation offered from warm water.
Bath oils offer the silky skin loving benefits of carrier oils such as almond, jojoba, olive, apricot and wheat germ. Essential oils are added which further add quality to a good bath oil. Certain plant essences contain anti-inflammatory properties or help eliminate toxins and fluid retention or do wonders for the weary spirit.
The salts used for bath salts contain necessary minerals such as magnesium which are so often lacking in our modern diets. By absorbing these minerals through our skin, we benefit by way of stress relief and even lowering blood pressure.
Bath salts aid with periodic detoxification and help to eliminate toxins.

Feel better, Sleep better and you'll Do better

Below are some of the bath products found within the Meadow Muffin Gardens shop.
 Here are just a few of the available bath oils, salts and scrubs:

Sensual Earth Patchouli and Lavender Bath Oil

Down in the Dumps Bath Oil

Lavender andYlangYlang Bath Salts

Grounding Earth Bath Salts

Salt Polish Body Scrub

Vanilla Sugar Scrub

Blackstrap Molasses...Good-bye Fatigue, Cramps

Starting a conversation with the phrase "back in the olden days" may immediately cause eyes to roll, with the thought being "here we go again", but many times those old days had the right idea.

Earl Mindell's Food as Medicine is a firm believer that what you eat can help prevent everything from colds to heart disease to cancer. The words "food" and "medicine" are once again being said in the same breath as physicians realize that it is necessary to treat the "whole body" rather than thinking that each bodily system needed its own specialist without the need to collaborate with one another to understand what is really going on with a patient.

Years ago before white sugar was the norm, blackstrap molasses was the principal sweetener used in cooking and baking. Cost and availability are usually the reason behind peoples' eating habits. The more processed a food gets the nutritional value usually decreases. Sugar is no exception.

Molasses is made from the sugar cane, a tropical grass that has been cultivated by humans for thousands of years. Light and brown, powdered and granulated white sugars are all highly refined with little nutritional value. The natural sugars we see in health food stores are made with fewer steps in their processing. The fewer the steps, the less impact on the environment as well as more of the naturally occurring vitamins and minerals will remain in the final product.

Blackstrap molasses contains significant amounts of vitamins and minerals. It is the syrup that remains after the sugar cane is made into table sugar. Blackstrap is the most concentrated and carmelized type. There are three different types of molasses: unsulfured, sulfured, and blackstrap.  To make molasses from sugar cane there are two tasks required. First the sugar cane juice has to be separated from the pulp, and then the sugar (sucrose) has to be extracted from the juice. To do that there are what they call "rounds of processing".

After a first round of processing, which involves spinning the juice and heating, the remaining syrup is the light molasses seen in the grocery store. It is light in color and has a mild taste. A second round of processing is done to extract more sucrose and that result is what is processed and sold as table sugar. The resulting syrup from that round is the dark molasses seen in the grocery store.

Finally, with a third round of processing, the result is known as blackstrap molasses. This syrup is dark, thick and the most nutritious. 

Significant amounts of calcium, copper, iron, magnesium, manganese, potassium and selenium are all found in blackstrap molasses.
Adding blackstrap molasses to the diet is like adding a source of power to your system. 

Anyone needing a boost in iron intake should consider working molasses into their food intake. Iron is critical for the proper transport of iron to all bodily tissues. Proper levels of hemoglobin and the formation of new cells in the body are maintained with ideal iron absorption. Compared to red meat, blackstrap molasses is lower in calories and doesn't contain any fat. 

Other health benefits of molasses include relief from diabetes, obesity, stress, acne and other skin problems, constipation, headaches, arthritis, anemia and even cancer. Bone health, electrolyte balance, hair care, the nervous system, stronger immune system and wound healing are all helped along with the nutritional benefits of blackstrap molasses.

It has also been found that blackstrap molasses is one of the best remedies around for menstrual cramps!
This is another one of those old-fashioned remedies our grandmothers swore by and fortunately such knowledge is making a comeback. 
Once a day, combine a tbsp of raw apple cider vinegar and a tbsp of blackstrap molasses in a glass of water. Raw Apple cider vinegar and raw honey is another combination that has survived the test of time for maintaining vitality. But being blackstrap molasses is so high in vitamins and minerals, it is ideal for helping with anemia, a real problem for menstruating women. Get the nutritional needs back in balance and a lot of those PMS symptoms will resolve themselves.   

Sulfur dioxide is often added to lighten the color of the molasses and extend its shelf life by preventing it from fermenting. Being there is a relationship between sulfur metabolism and sulfur dioxide and sulfites, the potential problems with allergic reactions to sulfites in foods may be good enough reason to look for unsulfured molasses. Another reason for that choice is that sulfur dioxide is a component in the production of acid rain.

It is doubtful you will find anyone today slathering their morning toast with blackstrap molasses as was done in Colonial days, but below are two great ways to sneak it in:

Iced Blackstrap Molasses (Earth Clinic) 

1 tbsp blackstrap molasses
hot water
3/4 cup milk or dairy substitute
ice

Add the molasses to a glass and add just enough hot water to cover the molasses. Stir until dissolved. Add the ice and top off with the milk, soymilk, almond milk or whatever you choose. Vanilla or chocolate almond, soy or coconut milk are all tasty additions.

Ginger Molasses Muffins (Marlene Falsetti from Taste of Home magazine)

1/2 cup vegetable oil
1/4 cup sugar
1/4 cup packed brown sugar

Beat the above three ingredients in a large size bowl.

1 egg
1 cup blackstrap molasses

Beat in the molasses and the egg.

In another bowl combine and sift together:

3 cups all-purpose flour or 1/2 all-purpose flour and 1/2 cup wheat flour 
1 1/2 tsp baking soda
1 tsp ground cinnamon
1 tsp ground ginger
1/2 tsp salt

Stir the dry mixture into the molasses mixture alternatively with 

1 cup water

Fill greased or paper lined muffin cups 2/3 full.
Bake at 350 degrees for 18 - 20 minutes.
Cool in pan for 10 minutes and remove muffins to a wire rack.
Makes about 20 muffins


Another hearty muffin recipe:

Molasses Raisin Muffins

Blackstrap Molasses Cookies (the hungry hounds blog)

3/4 cup butter, room temperature

1 cup brown sugar

1 egg

1/4 cup blackstrap molasses

1/4 cup corn syrup

Using a stand mixer or a hand mixer, beat the butter and brown sugar together at high speed for 3 minutes for stand mixer or 6 minutes with hand mixer.

Add egg, molasses and syrup

Mix to combine

2 1/4 cups flour

2 tsp baking soda

1 tsp cinnamon

3/4 tsp ground ginger

1/2 tsp allspice

1/2 tsp ground cloves

1/4 tsp ground black pepper

1/2 tsp salt

In another bowl, sift together the above dry ingredients.

Add the dry ingredients to the butter egg mixture. Mix only enough to blend together.

Refrigerate for at least an hour. Allows the dough to firm up for easier handling.

Preheat the oven to 375 degrees 

Make a sugar topping using:

1/2 cup sugar

Make dough balls with your hands and roll in the sugar

Place on greased cookie sheets

Bake 11 minutes

You are looking for the edges to be done, but the middles to appear under-cooked, this slight under baking helps cookies achieve the wanted soft texture yet crackly appearance

The Slow Fade of Dementia, Ambiguous and Anticipatory Loss, Grief

Caregivers bear the tremendous burden of witnessing the early signs of change in the behavior of their loved one and dealing with the anger and denial of trying to get through to the rest of the family. One very important thing family members don't understand is that unless you actually live with someone day in and day out you just don't see the same person as does the caregiver. The social stimulation of visits and the fussing from loved ones brought out conversation and smiles, only to return home and sink right back down under that black cloud.

Taking care of my mother for over two years has left me a puddle of tearful grief for the slow fading of my precious Mom and the bewildering, questioning of my own sanity. Changes in behavior brought the constant questions of what is normal for her personality, what is part of her condition, what could be a side effect from medications? Dealing with memory loss and confusion is bad enough for a person, but to add a chronic condition such as COPD on top of that and the resulting depression was enough to pull her down into a pit of despair. My desperation for her to fight only resulted in the wall between us to build brick by brick.




Together, we went through all the stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. Accepting this "new normal" as her life, having no choice but to leave her home and give up control and independence, was incomprehensible.  My reaction was to push, nag, beg, cry, whatever it took to get her to fight to maintain her strength, physically and mentally.  It was all- consuming, while my Mom continued to slowly lose a bit more of her spirit with each new day she woke to realize she had to get through another day. Fast forward three years and now that another sibling is caring for our mother, she is a medicated, zombie of her former self. The solution to the constant anxiety of struggling to breathe is that if the anxiety is relieved we can avoid the tendency to hyperventilate and thus panic. Welcome to the world of narcotics.

The stage of acceptance has arrived and she just doesn't care anymore. The version of Mom that is in the present is what the siblings actually interpret as her being "better". There is quiet and peace in the household only because there is no longer anyone "making waves" by pushing for alternatives and therapies. Palliative care is all there is now.

Gone is the frustration between what she "won't" versus "can't" do for herself. Now it is just the tender care as though she were our child. Now we deal with the guilt associated with our past reactions and emotions while dealing at that time with the craziness. But at that time we didn't understand what was going on. To reflect back now, bits and pieces make more sense. But that war of guilt continues to rage within our own minds, struggling for self-forgiveness for whatever we imagine we did so wrong.

Ambiguous loss and Anticipatory grief can be described as unresolved grief. It is different from the loss and grief surrounding a death. Closure is not possible and there is no peace because the loved one is still physically alive. This is the world surrounding and consuming a family dealing with dementia. This is the world of the patient herself as she must accept the slow loss of her own self and be very aware of it while it is happening.

There is confusion of the use of the words dementia and Alzheimer's disease. They are used interchangeably, but are not the same thing. Alzheimer's is a disease, dementia is not. Dementia is group of symptoms that affect mental tasks like memory and reasoning. Dementia can be caused by a variety of conditions, with Alzheimer's being the most common.

One of those conditions is called Vascular Dementia which is problems with the blood vessels. The brain needs a good supply of oxygen rich blood and if this supply is hindered and the brain is deprived of enough oxygen, as is with COPD, the brain cells could die. Symptoms may appear suddenly or gradually. A major stroke will cause symptoms to appear suddenly, while a series of mini strokes that may have happened over time, will cause a slower progression of symptoms.

There are several ways that COPD may affect thinking and memory. As less air is taken into the lungs, over time the blood oxygen levels in the blood become too low. Low levels of oxygen to the brain may cause neural damage with could increase the risk for memory problems. One big problem with a condition like COPD is that there is inflammation not just with the lungs, but inflammation of the entire body. Elevated levels of certain body chemicals related to inflammation can be linked to memory problems. Another issue is that because the body is working so hard to breathe and get enough oxygen there is the need to sleep more. If a person has trouble sleeping, the resulting fatigue can further interfere with thinking straight.

Since behavior changes can be so subtle, they may only be noticed by the patient himself/herself or by those who live with him or her. So the battle can begin with getting the message across to other family members that something is wrong and getting them to respect the patient or the caregiver's suspicions. It is interesting how differently people react to a physical condition versus something being wrong with the mind. At a time when family should be sticking together and supporting one another, it can become a nightmare when denial, fear, and/or the need for control over decisions, interferes with the big picture of what is best for the loved one.



Aside from going on and on with that, what it all boils down to is the fact that we miss our Mom. I miss the phone calls to rehash whatever event just happened in the family. I miss rambling on and on about the busy lives of our children. Gone is the interest she used to have in our world. Our children are going through the most exciting times in their lives with graduations, weddings, new careers, new homes...and though their beloved Nana is physically here, there is no longer the two way street of sharing in all those precious moments. The conversation is sadly one sided and often forgotten by the next day.
The strain to maintain a close relationship is becoming more difficult and though they call and visit, their lives are going on and their Nana is being left behind.

Witnessing the slow fade of someone we love is heart wrenching and everyone reacts differently in terms of their personal loss. Some hover and some run. We all deal with grief and loss in our own way and we need to respect one another without judgement. The emotional strain and pain of losing someone bit by bit is such a crazy state of limbo to have to go through. Though the mind may come to terms with the realities of the disease and expected outcome, it is unrealistic to expect the heart to be on the same time schedule. We have no choice but to anticipate that final loss, but to have to play the waiting game can be a horrendous, surreal roller coaster ride.


The best medicine in this world is love. When there is little else anyone can do, it is time to up the dose!

Mint and its Multitude of Uses

Peppermint is just one of many types of mint in the Mentha family. Though very common in the world of herbs mint is certainly not a lowly plant.

Known as the herb of hospitality, mint has long been used everywhere from the kitchen to the sickroom. Peppermint and spearmint are the most common types of mint, but there are several varieties that can be found at your local nursery in the herb section. A good way to identify whether a plant is in the mint family is to feel the stem. If it is squared rather than round it is in the mint family. Mints are low to no maintenance perennial plants. They are so hardy, they'll be happy to take over your entire garden. The roots spread by way of runners, so If you don't want it to continue to creep along, it is best to plant it in buried containers.

Peppermint has a powerful, menthol aroma that refreshes, energizes and improves mental clarity just by inhaling the steam from a cup of hot tea. Have a supply of mint tea on hand as well as a bottle of the essential oil. So many ailments can be eased with this one plant. Nausea can be relieved, cramping belly aches can be settled, pounding headaches can fade away, congestion can open up, aching, tired feet can perk up, heat flashes can be cooled, overexerted, sore muscles can relax, even kill germs in the air.

You probably already have minty products in your home cabinets, such as toothpaste, candles, mint candy, air sprays, soap, cough medicines, even cigarettes. However, it is unlikely that those scents are the real thing, most likely they were manufactured in a lab and what you are smelling is the synthetic version. Unless the scent is from the pure, therapeutic plant essential oils, don't expect to get the health benefits you wanted.

Just a few notes so you understand the difference between peppermint in herb form versus the essential oil. Essential oils are very concentrated and should always be diluted before applying to the skin, used with caution while pregnant, and should not be used with very young children.

Herbal peppermint in tea form is wonderful for pregnant women to help with nausea, but the essential oil may be too strong for the baby. It is okay to apply a few drops onto a tissue and breathe it in but don't apply the spray directly onto your skin.

Peppermint herbal tea is great for children's belly aches, nausea or headaches but in essential oil form it may be too strong for children under the age of eight. Please check with physician

People with high blood pressure, please check with your physician before using this product.

The use of aromatherapy can be wonderful when used safely. Adding just a few drops to a simmer pot releases the plant essences into the air which kill germs and help little ones breathe and sleep better. An old favorite I've used often when my children were small is the combination of:

3 drops lavender, 3 drops eucalyptus and 2 drops peppermint. There is no need to add more than a 10 drop total when using a diffuser, atomizer or simmer pot. The rule with essential oils is less is more. 

Below are wonderful products utilizing either the herbal infusion in olive oil or peppermint essential oil:

COOLING PEPPERMINT BODY SPRAY

 This versatile spray can be used for a multitude of purposes. Liberally spray yourself from head to toe as a way of cooling off should the discomfort be coming from the temperature outside, overexertion from a workout, or in getting through another heat flash.

Spray your counter tops or windowsills to deter the pathways of ants entering your home.

Spray areas you suspect mice are scurrying at night. Rodents detest the strong odor of mint.

Spray a tissue and inhale when feeling a pang of nausea in a moving vehicle.

Spray your fingertips and rub your temples to help relieve a throbbing headache.

Spray a tissue and inhale to open congested sinus passages.

 PEPPERMINT BATH SALTS

Salt baths are so common that we often forget the fact that "the simpler the better". A soak in warm salt water has long been used for achy joints, muscles, and tired feet, as well as a periodic detoxification. The addition of essential oils add their own therapeutic value as well as the pleasure of the aroma.

The addition of peppermint turns a warm bath into a helpful remedy for relieving clogged sinuses, sore muscles, throbbing headaches, as well as mental and physical fatigue. After a day's work in the heat or hours on your feet, a peppermint bath or foot soak will help bring a bounce back in your step. Realize,however, that being peppermint is stimulating, it will perk you up rather than help you relax for a night's sleep.

PEPPERMINT FOOT SOAK 

We demand a lot from our tired feet, therefore proper care and pampering should not be overlooked. This foot soak salt blend is wonderful to rejuvenate not only your feet but also your mood after a long day. Great to use as a preventative to fungal problems or as a natural treatment if you already are bothered by itchy feet.

SINUS AND CHEST VAPOR BALM

Congestion, seasonal allergies, cold and flu symptoms, sinus headaches all contribute to breathing discomfort. Home herbal remedies can make breathing a little easier.

If you look at commercial vapor balms,you'll notice they probably contain ingredients such as thymol, menthol, and eucalyptol. These are components of the essential oils: thyme, mint, and eucalyptus. This vapor balm can be applied onto the chest, back or feet. Should you want to increase its warming action lay a warm piece of flannel over the area.

An option to help open clogged sinuses is to apply just a bit under the nose.

HURTING TUMMY MASSAGE OIL

Children's Hurting Tummy Oil is a combination of peppermint-infused olive oil and an essential oil blend of chamomile, lemongrass and fennel. These herbs have a wonderful reputation for the relief of cramping and nausea. Belly massages are wonderful to relax and calm down colicky babies. Painful tightening of the stomach and intestinal muscles, gas and nausea can result from various sources: improper eating habits, emotional stress, or a moving vehicle.

If you have access to fresh mint, try cutting and making your own herbal tea, wonderful cold or hot. Cut enough stems to fill a large soup pot. Be sure the plants you are cutting were not sprayed with pesticides or herbicides. Mint shouldn't need either one but just know for sure before using the plants. Cover the pot and bring to a boil, cock the lid so it doesn't overflow. Let the tea simmer about 5 to 10 minutes, depending how strong you like your tea. You don't want to simmer it too long or you'll lose the important essential oils in the steam. Strain out the plant material and add sugar to taste. For sweet tea, 1 cup sugar to a gallon of tea is tasty. Enjoy a cup of hot tea right away and let the rest cool and store in the refrigerator for ice tea. This is wonderfully refreshing on a hot day.

Enjoy!

MEADOW MUFFIN MOMENTS, WEEK 19, May 7 - May 13

Meditations For Women Who Do Too Much

May 7
"What you know in your head will not sustain you in moments of crisis...confidence comes from body awareness, knowing what you feel in the moment."
Marion Woodman

Our feelings are what makes us human, yet we live in a society that tends to see feelings as fickle, irrational and unnecessary for the road to personal success. Maybe for a robotic society that may be correct but certainly not for the success of what makes for the intricate beings we really are. Feelings are a gift that brings us in touch with the world we live in, that connects us with each other, gives us the signals we need to read behavior and cope with life in general.

May 8
"She would greet us pleasantly, and immediately she seemed to surround the chaotic atmosphere of morning strife with something of order, of efficient and quiet uniformity, so that one had the feeling that life was small and curiously ordered."
Meridel LeSueur

We can all relate to situations such as this. The domino effect is happening and things may appear to be getting out of hand. One person's high-strung energy may be trying to emit control and order but in doing so, that charged, nervous energy is filtering around the room creating tension. Another person in the same situation may give off a quiet, confident presence that others tend to gravitate towards; calm, cool and collected. Order that comes from such a person is so much more peaceful, the definition of serenity.

May 9
"You can get lonesome-being that busy."
Isabel Lennart

People who are overly busy all the time may read this and dismiss it. The truth may be that it is possible to not realize we are lonely because we don't stop long enough to be in touch with what we are feeling. Our work can be like a jealous lover, demanding more and more. It is good to be productive, but not at the expense of intimacy and time needed to nurture our relationships with those we love.

May 10
"So instant intimacy was too often followed by disillusion."
May Sarton

While it is possible to feel an instant connection with someone, it is a mistake to think if we find the right person we'll know immediately that this is the one. True intimacy is a process that takes time and if you don't have time for what that involves, then the relationship probably won't develop beyond a quick flame that fizzles rather quickly. It is said that instant intimacy is one of the characteristics of addictive relationships.

May 11
"Each woman is being made to feel it is her own cross to bear if she can't be the perfect clone of the male superman and the perfect clone of the feminine mystique."
Betty Friedan

Sometimes there is just too much to do, too many roles to play, and too much pressure to be and do it all. The way to handle life when the vise starts to tighten is to realize that we have the power to control its turning. Rather than blocking out the anguish all the stress is causing and thinking we are weak if we admit it, we would be much better off if we would just acknowledge what is happening and step out away from it.

May 12
"I wish I'd a knowed more people. I would of loved 'em all. If I'd a knowed more, I would loved more."
Toni Morrison

There is no limit to the amount of love we can share. Love is an energy that is shared because we have it, simple as that. It should not be dolled out as a means to get something in return. It should not be parceled out in piecemeal due to the fear that to give freely will only get us hurt. Love is something that flows out of out deep sense of loving ourselves. It is not possible to love another if we don't know and love ourselves. Once we love who we are, we'll be much more open to getting to know other people. We'll soon learn there is plenty of that love to go around and the reserves won't be drained dry.

May 13
"The thing about having a baby is that thereafter you have it."
Jean Kerr

While it is true that babies are born a clean slate, it is a disillusion to think we can shape them how we see fit and they'll stay that way. Parenting is an intimate, interactive process that continues for the rest of our lives. Only when we stop with the fantasy child image can we begin to see who these little people really are. And when we do that it is a great step in giving our children the autonomy they need to develop into independent adults.



To read the previous posts:

To read the previous weeks' posts:
Week 1 January 1 - January 7
Week 2 January 8 - January 14
Week 3 January 15 - January 21
Week 4 January 22 - January 28

Week 5 January 29 - February 4
Week 6 February 5 - February 11
Week 7 February 12 - February 18
Week 8 February 19 - February 25

Week 9 February 26 - March 4
Week 10 March 5 - March 11
Week 11 March 12 - March 18 
Week 12 March 19 - March 25
Week 13 March 26 - April 1 

Week 14 April 2 - April 8 
Week 15 April 9 - April 15 
Week 16 April 16 - April 22
Week 17 April 23 - 29 

Week 18 April 30 - May 6

MEADOW MUFFIN MOMENTS, WEEK 18, April 30 - May 6

Meditations For Women Who Do Too Much

April 30
"One of the reasons our society has become such a mess is that we're isolated from each other."
Maggie Kuhn

A characteristic of any addiction is that the person tends to cut herself off from people. Women who do too much are no different. Priorities tend to get out of balance and getting the work done takes precedence over social events. By not having the time to reach out to people, we tend to forget how. After declining enough invitations, people often stop asking.We tend to feel if we're just left alone we'll have more time, feel less stress and more accomplished. But in the end, all we feel is exhausted. Workaholics needs to learn the difference between isolation and solitude.

May 1
"Normal day, let me be aware of the treasure you are. Let me learn from you, love you, bless you before you depart. Let me not pass you by in quest of some rare and perfect tomorrow. Let me hold you while I may, for it may not always be so. One day I shall dig my nails into the earth, or bury my face in the pillow, or stretch myself taut, or raise my hands to the sky and want, more than all the world, your return."
Mary Jean Iron

All we really have is the moment we are in right now. Too often we squander the treasure of what today has to offer and regret it later because we can never get those lost moments back. We have to remember that the past is done and the future my never be. Today may be just a normal day, but it is a gift.

May 2
"Remember, Ginger Rogers did everything Fred Astaire did, but she did it backwards and in high heels."
Faith Whittlesey

Being good at what we do is not a curse, nor something to feel vain if acknowledged. Humility can be the denial of an expertise, which is a loss to not only ourselves but to others who could benefit from our gifts. Our strange culture seems to want us competitive and passive at the same time. It takes courage to acknowledge how good we are at what we do and be proud of it.

May 3
"That was a time when only the dead could smile."
Anna Akhmatova

As with any addiction, hitting bottom is often what it takes to force one to make some changes. Once the depths of despair have been reached and the journey back out has been successful, the feeling of relief, and the joy for the chance of a new life, can be some of the most accomplished feelings of a lifetime.

May 4
"Yesterday is a cancelled check. tomorrow is a promissory note. Today is cash in hand; spend it wisely."
Anonymous

Too bad there isn't a name to give credit to this wise analogy. Nothing kills the present moment quicker than worrying about what hasn't happened yet or stewing over things that have happened that we cannot change. We need to do our lives, not just think about it.

May 5
"The social workers have named a new syndrome. It's called "compassion fatigue." Why does it sound so familiar?"
Anne Wilson Schaef

As a society, we are trained that if we take care of people, they in turn will take care of us. Relationships are built on taking care of each other, and if we took care first, we would certainly get the same in return. How naive we feel when we get the rude awakening that this isn't always how it turns out. Not everyone shares that feeling of obligation. Human nature has it that too often the more we take care of people, the more they seem to want. It doesn't take long before caregivers are drained emotionally and physically, and the feelings of being overwhelmed result in resentment. Recognizing that those feelings are very normal helps with the guilt over feeling that way about someone you love.

May 6
"Make a prayer acknowledging yourself as a vehicle of light, giving thanks for the good that has come that day and an affirmation of intent to live in harmony with all your relations."
Dhyani Ywahoo

Part of any healing and recovery is that we begin to see the good that we do each day and the good that comes to us each day. We tend to really understand gratitude. We begin to live in harmony with those around us and treasure those relationships. 



To read the previous posts:

To read the previous weeks' posts:
Week 1 January 1 - January 7
Week 2 January 8 - January 14
Week 3 January 15 - January 21
Week 4 January 22 - January 28

Week 5 January 29 - February 4
Week 6 February 5 - February 11
Week 7 February 12 - February 18
Week 8 February 19 - February 25

Week 9 February 26 - March 4
Week 10 March 5 - March 11
Week 11 March 12 - March 18 
Week 12 March 19 - March 25

Week 13 March 26 - April 1 
Week 14 April 2 - April 8 
Week 15 April 9 - April 15 
Week 16 April 16 - April 22

Week 17 April 23 - April 29

Detox with Dandelion, Your Body's Spring Cleaning

dandelion greens

Spring cleaning is not just for your home or yard. It is time to clean out the body as well. In the past, before supermarkets offered fresh vegetables all year long, people relied on canned, dried or pickled foods to get them through the winter. Fresh vegetables usually consisted of potatoes, winter squash and root vegetables, those that if stored properly, would last for months. By spring, people looked forward to those first peeks of fresh greens in their gardens. Though called weeds by the majority of people today, these plants were what was called bitters.

Stinging nettles, chickweed, burdock, mints and dandelions are just some of the edible weeds often sought out by foragers. If you are interested in supplying your own greens, just be sure you are cutting plants that have not been exposed to herbicides or pesticides.

Dandelions have been used or ages to detox and fortify the liver. By lowering cholesterol levels, liver function improves.

Dandelion leaves are high in the electrolytes sodium and potassium, thus they may help support the kidneys as a natural diuretic. A diuretic helps increase urine output, allowing the body to reduce water retention.

Anyone with digestive issues needs to add bitters to their diet. By increasing hydrochloric acid in the stomach, digestion is improved, gas in reduced, elimination is more regular, and all in all, less bloating and belly aches.

High in calcium, dandelions are proof you can meet your calcium requirements without relying solely on dairy.

Dandelions are what you could call a multivitamin green. High in iron, potassium, magnesium, manganese, phosphorus, calcium, beta carotene, copper, vitamin C, vitamin B1, vitamin B2, vitamin B6, vitamin E and vitamin K.

At this point you may be thinking, "yea right, I have trouble getting my family to eat lettuce, how in the world am I going to get them to eat weeds."

Well, unless your diet has routinely included cooked greens, it may take some getting used to. Dandelion leaves are on the bitter side, so it is best to collect them before flowering. But since we may not even notice them until we see yellow, we just have to find ways of cooking that add flavor and reduce the bitterness. The leaves can always be added fresh to salads or chopped up and put into soups. If you want to try them as a side dish, here is the basic recipe for Sauteed Greens:

Wash the fresh leaves in a strainer to remove any dirt.
Put in a large pot with only the clinging moisture from washing.
Add a dab of butter or olive oil.
Saute on medium heat till wilted. This only takes 7 - 10 minutes. Greens should be cooked only until they turn bright green. If the color darkens, the greens have been cooked too long.
Add salt and pepper to taste and serve.

Other options:
1. First saute onions and garlic in butter and then add the greens.
2. Fry bacon, remove to a plate and use the drippings to cook the greens. Then dice the bacon and return to pan to heat through before serving.
3. Add balsamic vinegar before serving.
4. Add Bragg's Liquid Aminos before serving.

I have to admit, I need to find ways to make this dish more enticing. Perhaps chop up the leaves first and they definitely needed something like bacon or ham. I may have overcooked them a bit so need to work on that too.

My mother told me her mother used to make a Hot Bacon Dressing and served it over fresh dandelion leaves. The dressing was hot so it wilted the greens just enough.

6 slices diced bacon
1/2 cup finely chopped onion
vegetable oil
2 tsp cornstarch mixed with 2 tsp water
1/2 cup white vinegar
1/2 cup water
1/4 cup sugar
salt and pepper

Fry the bacon until crisp.
Remove the bacon from pan, leaving the fat.
Set bacon aside.
Add onion to bacon fat and cook five minutes or until soft.
Set onion aside with the bacon.
Pour bacon fat into measuring cup and add enough vegetable oil to equal 1/2 cup.
Combine vinegar, water, sugar, salt and pepper in small saucepan and heat to a boil.
Add cornstarch mixture and cook until thickened, about 1 - 2 minutes.
Remove from heat and add bacon and onion.
Serve while warm. Pour over fresh dandelion leaves.


There are several ways to get the benefits of these plants:

Teas: Light infusions made with fresh or dried flowers, leaves or roots
Decoctions: Simmering tougher plant material such as the roots for up to 20 minutes
Tinctures: Made with alcohol or vegetable glycerin to extract the medicinal properties. Very concentrated, drops are added to water, juice or tea

To make any of these, follow these rules:
Dried herbs use 1 tsp dried herb to 1 cup boiling water.
Fresh herbs use 1 tbsp fresh herb to 1 cup boiling water.

MEADOW MUFFIN MOMENTS, WEEK 17, April 23 - April 29

Meditations For Women Who Do Too Much

April 23
"Shit work is infinitely safe. In exchange for doing it you can extract an unconscionable return...the women's pound of flesh."
Colette Dowling

Let's face it, a lot of the work women do is shit work. We do it because it has to get done, as mundane as it can get. Of course there are other things we would rather be doing and we do get tired of cleaning up after others. I think the point Colette is making here is that we cannot get ourselves in the habit of making others feel guilty with our sulky attitude. We may not be able to change a situation at the moment but we can change our attitude towards the situation. If we can make a change, then start the ball rolling to make necessary changes. Seek other employment, be more assertive with your wants, if able, pay for outside help in the home, learn to direct others to help out, and there is always the option to just say no.

April 24
"Out of the strain of the Doing, Into the peace of the Done."
Julia Louise Woodruff

There is always work to be done and ideally, when a task or project is complete we can stand back and be proud of ourselves for a job well done. If we believe in the "work before play" philosophy then once the work is done there is no problem with then going off and having a good time. The problem with workaholics is that they never feel okay with "being done". There is a sense of guilt with doing nothing, as if they are wasting time, as if they'll be judged as being lazy. Should someone walk in and "catch them" there is the impulse to jump up. Being projectless and being worthless are not synonymous. Where does this guilt all start anyway?

April 25
"The experience of God, or in any case the possibility of experiencing God, is innate."
Alice Walker

We as humans have a natural yearning to believe in something greater than ourselves. There is no need to seek out professional advice on how to "find" God. We don't have to look for the possibility of experiencing a greater power, it is already within us. The key is to stop thinking there is an instruction book. There is no need to get so into rituals that we neglect the necessity to seek within ourselves in order to feel something.

April 26
"The season is changeable, fitful, and maddening as I am myself these days that are cloaked with too many demands and engagements."
May Sarton

When we do not recognize the signs telling us that we have become overloaded, we end up in situations that involve drama, emotion, misunderstandings and unintended outbursts. The classic red flag that we need time for ourselves is if we constantly say to ourselves, "I wish I could just be left alone." Keep it up and you will be left alone because bridges will be burned and people will avoid you. We have to become better at taking care of ourselves, taking necessary time outs and avoid such a crisis.

April 27
"I discovered I always have choices and sometimes it's only a choice of attitude."
Judith M. Knowlton

Once our judgement gets to the point that we feel in a corner and trapped, we forget about the power of compromise. To feel there are no options other than to stay in a situation or else leave, is often just not true. Often it is not the situation that is keeping us stuck but our attitude about our situation. To lighten or shift perspective isn't denying the right you have to feel as you do, but if the burden is harming your mental and physical health, perhaps it is time to let it go.

April 28
"Oh, it was a glorious morning! I suppose the best kind of spring morning is the best weather God has to offer. It certainly helps one to believe in Him."
Dodie Smith

When we go through our days and barely notice the change of seasons, it is time to stop and look up. Too often when we listen to the weather report it is for no other reason than to know ahead of time if we will be held up with snow, ice, rain or fog. Those who live in the city are especially prone to missing out on the many gifts of the great outdoors. Taking the time to appreciate a beautiful day is wonderful for reducing stress and perhaps the needed nudge to start living in the moment.

April 29
"All women hustle. Women watch faces, voices, gestures, moods. The person who has to survive through cunning."
Marge Piercy

The ability to notice detail is a wonderful skill. But many of us preen this skill only to evaluate and prepare for every situation we are in. Our fear that whatever we do will not be enough or that we are not enough to really matter anyway, results in living as though our very survival depended on knowing just how to act. There comes a time when we should just say, "enough already, this is who I am, accept it."


To read the previous posts:

To read the previous weeks' posts:
Week 1 January 1 - January 7
Week 2 January 8 - January 14
Week 3 January 15 - January 21
Week 4 January 22 - January 28

Week 5 January 29 - February 4
Week 6 February 5 - February 11
Week 7 February 12 - February 18
Week 8 February 19 - February 25

Week 9 February 26 - March 4
Week 10 March 5 - March 11
Week 11 March 12 - March 18 
Week 12 March 19 - March 25

Week 13 March 26 - April 1 
Week 14 April 2 - April 8 
Week 15 April 9 - April 15 
Week 16 April 16 - April 22

MEADOW MUFFIN MOMENTS, WEEK 16, April 16 - April 22

Meditations For Women Who Do Too Much

April 16
"Dependency invites encroachment."
Patricia Meyer Spacks

This day's meditation starts with a statement that makes one stop and think..really?
"We women who do too much are terrified of being dependent." She says our fear of dependency often results in behavior that looks like independence. We have trouble asking for help because we don't trust anyone. If that is true than I know several women who appear so very strong in handling things, it is a shocker to think they could have issues of their own. Supposedly, we need to define ourselves in terms other than dependency, to not let others form our identities for us, and then we'll be free to bring our true selves to our relationships with people.

April 17
"The new space...has a kind of invisibility to those who have not entered it."
Mary Daly

In our desire to keep everything under control, we find it very difficult to leap into the unknown. To change our ways requires faith in a journey in which we cannot be sure of the way. That can be terrifying to someone who knows there has to be a better way but lets fear hold them back. All it takes is that first step.

April 18
"And to all those voices of wisdom that have whispered to me along the way."
Dhyani Ywahoo

There have been voices of wisdom all around us all our lives. Some of that wisdom has been learned from others and some has been self-taught, but all of it usually came at the time we needed it most. There are so many people who love to share their experiences and knowledge. Appreciation and gratitude are wonderful.

April 19
"Sometimes I wish I had suction cups to hold me down."
Pam

Why is it so hard for some of us to just stay in a seat! The wheels are always turning and sometimes we may feel powerless to control that urge to do something and do it right now. We can be powerful women at the same time as we can be powerless over our crazy lives. What a relief to know that if we just turn everything over to a power greater than ourselves, the pressure is greatly reduced to a level of sanity.

April 20
"You need to claim the events of your life to make yourself yours. When you truly possess all you have been and done, which may take some time, you are fierce with reality."
Flonda Scott Maxwell

We all need a reality check once in a while. We need to stop and take a thorough inventory of who we are and what we have done, both the good and the bad. This is much more than just focusing on things we could have done differently. This is about realizing the many positive qualities that make us who we are. Acknowledge the whole package deal and like it. Only then can we be on the path to becoming who we are.

April 21
"Until the missing story of ourselves is told, nothing besides told can suffice us: we shall go on quietly craving it."
Laura Riding

We cannot possibly offer what we have until we know just who we are. The most important journey we will ever take is the journey inward. Each of us is a unique combination of heredity and experiences, and no one else can offer what our individuality can offer. We just have to slow down and take the time to find out what there is about us that is so special. It would be a real shame to waste that potential offering in this life.

April 22
"When self-respect takes its rightful place in the psyche of woman, she will not allow herself to be manipulated by anyone."
Indira Mahindra

There are many aspects of ourselves that merit self-respect. Our competency, our flexibility, our ability to multitask, to articulate our ideas, our organizational skills, the list goes on. People around us need to accept our contributions as strengths and give us the respect we deserve. And we need to demand that self-respect from ourselves by not being manipulated.


To read the previous posts:

To read the previous weeks' posts:
Week 1 January 1 - January 7
Week 2 January 8 - January 14
Week 3 January 15 - January 21
Week 4 January 22 - January 28

Week 5 January 29 - February 4
Week 6 February 5 - February 11
Week 7 February 12 - February 18
Week 8 February 19 - February 25

Week 9 February 26 - March 4
Week 10 March 5 - March 11
Week 11 March 12 - March 18 
Week 12 March 19 - March 25

Week 13 March 26 - April 1 
Week 14 April 2 - April 8 
Week 15 April 9 - April 15