|Meditations For Women Who Do Too Much|
"One of the reasons our society has become such a mess is that we're isolated from each other."
A characteristic of any addiction is that the person tends to cut herself off from people. Women who do too much are no different. Priorities tend to get out of balance and getting the work done takes precedence over social events. By not having the time to reach out to people, we tend to forget how. After declining enough invitations, people often stop asking.We tend to feel if we're just left alone we'll have more time, feel less stress and more accomplished. But in the end, all we feel is exhausted. Workaholics needs to learn the difference between isolation and solitude.
"Normal day, let me be aware of the treasure you are. Let me learn from you, love you, bless you before you depart. Let me not pass you by in quest of some rare and perfect tomorrow. Let me hold you while I may, for it may not always be so. One day I shall dig my nails into the earth, or bury my face in the pillow, or stretch myself taut, or raise my hands to the sky and want, more than all the world, your return."
Mary Jean Iron
All we really have is the moment we are in right now. Too often we squander the treasure of what today has to offer and regret it later because we can never get those lost moments back. We have to remember that the past is done and the future my never be. Today may be just a normal day, but it is a gift.
"Remember, Ginger Rogers did everything Fred Astaire did, but she did it backwards and in high heels."
Being good at what we do is not a curse, nor something to feel vain if acknowledged. Humility can be the denial of an expertise, which is a loss to not only ourselves but to others who could benefit from our gifts. Our strange culture seems to want us competitive and passive at the same time. It takes courage to acknowledge how good we are at what we do and be proud of it.
"That was a time when only the dead could smile."
As with any addiction, hitting bottom is often what it takes to force one to make some changes. Once the depths of despair have been reached and the journey back out has been successful, the feeling of relief, and the joy for the chance of a new life, can be some of the most accomplished feelings of a lifetime.
"Yesterday is a cancelled check. tomorrow is a promissory note. Today is cash in hand; spend it wisely."
Too bad there isn't a name to give credit to this wise analogy. Nothing kills the present moment quicker than worrying about what hasn't happened yet or stewing over things that have happened that we cannot change. We need to do our lives, not just think about it.
"The social workers have named a new syndrome. It's called "compassion fatigue." Why does it sound so familiar?"
Anne Wilson Schaef
As a society, we are trained that if we take care of people, they in turn will take care of us. Relationships are built on taking care of each other, and if we took care first, we would certainly get the same in return. How naive we feel when we get the rude awakening that this isn't always how it turns out. Not everyone shares that feeling of obligation. Human nature has it that too often the more we take care of people, the more they seem to want. It doesn't take long before caregivers are drained emotionally and physically, and the feelings of being overwhelmed result in resentment. Recognizing that those feelings are very normal helps with the guilt over feeling that way about someone you love.
"Make a prayer acknowledging yourself as a vehicle of light, giving thanks for the good that has come that day and an affirmation of intent to live in harmony with all your relations."
Part of any healing and recovery is that we begin to see the good that we do each day and the good that comes to us each day. We tend to really understand gratitude. We begin to live in harmony with those around us and treasure those relationships.
To read the previous posts:
To read the previous weeks' posts:
Week 1 January 1 - January 7
Week 2 January 8 - January 14
Week 3 January 15 - January 21
Week 4 January 22 - January 28
Week 5 January 29 - February 4
Week 6 February 5 - February 11
Week 7 February 12 - February 18
Week 8 February 19 - February 25
Week 9 February 26 - March 4
Week 10 March 5 - March 11
Week 11 March 12 - March 18
Week 12 March 19 - March 25
Week 13 March 26 - April 1
Week 14 April 2 - April 8
Week 15 April 9 - April 15
Week 16 April 16 - April 22
Week 17 April 23 - April 29